Perfection is the Enemy of Progress

Hi friends and family! Happy 2023! Thank you for continuously being patient with me. I know that when I started this whole blog and email list you were probably expecting more frequent and interesting updates about where James and I are in our travels. We’re currently in Sedona, AZ, after spending 2 weeks at home for the holidays. It was relaxing and wonderful to spend time with family and friends.

It has been an absolutely incredible year! Pretty much every day James and I look at each other and say something along the lines of how we’re so dang lucky and we can’t believe this is our life. We are trying our best to soak in every moment and carry it all with us, which has made my updates less frequent than originally planned. We’ve seen almost every part of the country that we’ve wanted to see (with the exception of a few places on the East Coast) and have learned how to pivot. I got Covid in November, which altered our plans, and we shifted our tentative schedule around over the summer so we could see friends who we haven’t seen in a while and be with family during difficult times.

All that said, it’s been both exciting and a challenge to keep up this year. To be frank, I’m quite sick of social media. I’m in it every day because it’s my job. I often find myself scrolling mindlessly and then beating myself up for wasting so much time. I hate all of the recycled memes that I see over and over again year after year. I hate the New Year’s resolutions, the pressure to change yourself for the better, the diet culture promoted online that has led me to an unhealthy relationship with food and my body. I hate the recap videos showing a montage of perfect little 2 second clips of every movie-like moment but failing to show every time we cried on the bathroom floor, failed to meet our own expectations, hurt someone we love, drank too much and said something we regretted, or looked in the mirror and didn’t like what we saw.

But I also love the way it keeps us connected. I love seeing photos of my nephew and my friends’ babies and dogs and job updates and pregnancy progress photos because I don’t get to see the growth every day in person. I love the positive and uplifting messages that many people choose to share. I love the community of support that it creates for people going through a tough time or losing a loved one. I love that it leads to new discoveries like places to travel, music, books, and art to enjoy, recipes to cook, or habits to create for ourselves. I love that it makes home feel like it’s not so far away. I both love and hate social media at the same time.

I haven’t been updating the blogs because I feel the need to curate the perfect TikTok or Instagram Reel to pair with my post, and what’s the point of it all if it isn’t perfect? I thought that this would be a great opportunity to grow my online presence and inspire people with my stories. But alas, perfection is the enemy of progress.

I am also reminded time and time again that life is short. That there are more important things to be worried about. That I need to live in the moment and enjoy my life. Now more than ever, I feel the need to take risks and live life exactly the way I want to without regret and without worrying about insignificant things like social media. Life is way too short to be anything but exactly what you want it to be.

We lost some truly special people and pets in 2022 and some of our closest loved ones have been sick. Coping with grief, loss, support, and uncertainty while on the road has been difficult. I feel like I’m constantly on a rollercoaster of emotions and am learning to accept ambiguity and the beauty of both/and.

Feeling both incredibly lucky and incredibly sad.

Both guilt that maybe I haven’t mourned for long enough, and knowing that the loved ones we’ve lost would want us to enjoy this adventure.

Both missing family and wanting to be there for them, and joy in seeing some of this country’s most beautiful places for the first time.

Both fully confident in our decision to travel and see the world while we’re young and questioning our path in life, career, and timing.

Both exploring as much as we can in each location while balancing work, rest and fun, and feeling guilty for not keeping everyone up to date on our whereabouts.

Both in awe of the world around us and angry that this land was stolen from Indigenous people.

Both joyful and becoming overwhelmed with grief during unexpected times.

Both wanting to please others and wanting to do what’s best for me.

Both happy that we get to do this every day and upset about the countless unhoused Americans in every city across the country.

Both excited for my friends and family as they reach milestones and sad that I’m not with them to celebrate.

Both wanting to share my experiences and emotions with the world and recognizing that I don’t owe anyone my experiences and it’s okay to want to keep it all to myself.

This year, I’m not making any resolutions. I’m not going to promise you more blog posts because, frankly, I will never meet my own impossible expectations. I’m going to forgive myself. I’m going to continue to do what I’ve been doing: building a life filled with love, curiosity, and adventure. If there’s one thing I’m going to change, it’s to go easier on myself. To accept myself for who I am, exactly as I am right now. It’s something I’ve been working on in therapy for the past year (btw, if your resolutions aren’t resolutioning, I can’t recommend therapy enough. This is your sign to just do it already). I’m going to both accept that I will never be perfect and do the damn thing anyway.

So, I’m sorry if this wasn’t the 2022 travel recap you were looking for. But I hope it inspires you to embrace the ambiguity.

Peace, love, and hugs,
— Maggie